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Demi Damai (2020)

In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

ABIDE

- put up with, tolerate; await;

Turutkan rasa inginkan sama, orang lain akan sentiasa lebih daripada kamu. 

Turutkan hati mahukan lebih, keinginanmu takkan pernah cukup.

Malam. Langit berbintang. Di latari siren polis di jalanan.


“You baca tak berita semalam pasal sekumpulan homeless teenagers yang terjun jambatan sebab tak tahan dengan bebanan hidup?”


“Yeah. I felt sorry for them, they were just 17.” Redza meletakkan dua tin minuman di antara mereka sambil melabuhkan duduk di atas hamparan padang rumput.


“Adil ke untuk manusia dapat penamat yang macam tu? Macam... dunia luar menakutkan kut, dan mereka sepatutnya dilindungi.”


“Do you mean by equality?” Redza berpaling ke arah orang di sebelah.


Quril mengangkat sebelah bahu. “At least an education to survive this world, perhaps. Don’t you think that if all of us have the same environment and opportunity, it will be less jealousy, nobody hurt, make it easier to thank God and just live a happy life?”


Redza senyum segaris. “It won’t be that easy to thank God, hun. Secara dasarnya, kita semua serupa dengan tujuan yang pelbagai. Perjalanan berbeza, ujian berbeza. All sadness hurts, its just a different kind of hurt. You tak akan ada semua benda dalam hidup, tapi you boleh rasa cukup.” Redza membetulkan rambut yang beralun di tiup angin. 


“It’s depend on your luck, then.” Quril merenung langit gelap yang berbintang nun di atas sana.


“Not exclusively.” Redza menampung tubuh dengan kedua belah lengan. Lebih santai. “You can’t simply saying that if you are born genius, have a good supporting system, you will secure a better career, everything will doing fine -naa. Ujian akan datang dalam pelbagai bentuk. Orang cuma akan nampak apa yang mereka mahu lihat, tunjuk apa yang mereka mahu tunjuk kerana sesetengahnya hanya ingin meraikan kegagalan orang lain.” Redza menghela nafas panjang. “Tapi kita punya tujuan hidup yang lebih dari itu, Q. Kita kena pastikan yang dunia ni jadi tempat yang lebih baik untuk didiami dengan kebaikan kecil yang kita lakukan. Kita semua ada tanggungjawab terhadap orang lain. Macam remaja-remaja tu.”


Quril tarik nafas panjang. “Kebaikan, tujuan, lebih baik.” Ulang dia perlahan. 


Demi sesungguhnya! Kami akan menguji kamu dengan sedikit perasaan takut (kepada musuh) dan (dengan merasai) kelaparan, dan (dengan berlakunya) kekurangan dari harta benda dan jiwa serta hasil tanaman. Dan berilah khabar gembira kepada orang-orang yang sabar [ Al Baqara 155 ]


Jeda.


“May I know, what shape your identity?” Quril mencabut rumput tanpa mengangkat wajah.


Redza senyum. “I want to be someone that I needed when I was younger.” 


Jawapan itu membuatkan Quril terkesima. Dia bagaikan menghirup udara segar di tengah padang pasir yang kontang. Kembali bernyawa. “What was your childhood like?”


“My first man never believe in me. I still remember that mocking smile when I said I want to be a doctor. And I was just 7, got affected for my whole life.”


“I’m sorry.” Balasnya, bersimpati.


“I’m thankful for that moment, hoping to be the last person who live with that scars. Sejak hari tu, I want to be that one person who have someone’s back, cheerish every single purest dreams and appreciate little things.”


“Thank you, Doktor Redza.”


“For what?”


“For be someone that I needed.”


Kita hidup mengikut apa yang Tuhan mahu, kan? 


“The equality is already there, because He is near. We have to accept the fact that we can’t change our past dan hakikat yang kita tak boleh ubah, but our determination BUILD a better future. It’s never too late, for a better life here and hereafter.”


Quril senyum, ikhlas dengan mata bersinar. “Here, and hereafter.”


Dan orang-orang yang beriman serta beramal soleh, merekalah ahli syurga, mereka kekal di dalamnya. [ Al Baqara, 82 ]


9:11 p.m. 

25 Mei 2020


Happy Eid, people.

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